Jim Sterling, Youtube video game critic and creator of Boglin Watch, was today forced to hack his left hand off from the wrist after a Boglin he was wearing tried to kill him.
Boglins were a series of toy hand puppets created by Mattel that rose to popularity in the late eighties and early nineties. As of mid 2016, Jim Sterling is at the forefront of what is considered by many to be a Boglin revival.
He acquired several new Boglins recently while attending an exhibition in New York. There was however one Boglin that Jim failed to get his hands on. The Boo-glin.
“I was devastated,” said Jim, speaking to Omen World News. “That particular one was calling out to me. I bid as high as I could but it wasn’t enough. I settled for a couple of other ones, but I knew I would never feel the same about them.”
Several days after returning from New York disappointment turned to shock when Jim received a package in the post. It was the Boo-glin.
“It was beautiful. I was overjoyed. There was no note or anything, just the Boo-glin. I didn’t think twice about shoving my hand right in there.”
The scene quickly turned grim once Jim had his hand inside the rare Boglin. “It was as if it contracted around my hand. I felt a cold sensation creep up my forearm, kind of like pins and needles. My whole arm was numb within seconds. That’s when the Boo-glin, completely of it’s own volition, turned and looked at me. It’s eyes were deep dark black pits, but somehow glowing.”
Jim’s new puppet had become possessed and began thrashing around at the end of his arm, dragging it’s victim helplessly around the living room.
“My friend Chip was there, talking constantly as usual. He thought I was joking. That I was letting the Boglin lead me around as if it was in control. You know, I do s**t like that all the time.”
The Boglin pulled him ‘almost comically’ out of the living room and towards the kitchen.
“I’m a big guy,” said Jim. “I was lumbering around crashing into things. I smashed up damn near half my kitchen!”
The possessed puppet was frantic at this point, grabbing at anything it could. It pulled the cutlery drawer from the cabinet, sending an array of knives crashing down. According to Jim, the puppet threw itself to the floor, grabbing hold of two steak knives – one in each of its miniature hands.
“That part is kind of a blur to be honest,” Jim recalled. “It was swinging the knife around and I was doing my best to hold it off. Chip, of course, wouldn’t shut the f**k up. I spotted a cleaver on the floor and grabbed it. Next thing I know I was just laying there pounding it into my forearm. It was chaos, there was blood everywhere.”
Jim woke up in a the local hospital having amputated his own hand. While many fans have offered their support, Jim has not received a universally sympathetic response. This is due to a number of unsettling allegations surrounding the YouTube personality
There have been hundreds of unsubstantiated reports connecting Jim Sterling to ‘Jimsaw’, notorious sadist and creator of sick scenarios in which victims are often forced to self-mutilate. Some of his more vocal detractors have called the incident ‘justice’ and a ‘poetic lesson in irony’.
Others claim that this proves Jim’s innocence as it has all the hallmarks of a ‘Jimsaw’ setup, showing once and for all that Jim could not be ‘Jimsaw’.
Jim has assured his fans that this incident will not affect his publishing schedule. New episodes of his hit shows are already in the works. However, the Boo-glin and Jim’s left hand both mysteriously disappeared after the incident and will not be featured on the next Boglin Watch.